Over the years I've learned the hard way which lines work and which lines do not work when picking up women. Well...okay mainly I've learned which lines do NOT work.

Here they are:

1) You have a pretty mouth.

2) I admire your fatty deposits

3) You have good birthing hips

4) Do you want to see my turtle?

5) You seem clean.

6) Do you like to cook?

7) Do you want to see my Chevette?

8) Want to play video games on my computer?

9) Not all of that is dandruff.

10) Actually, not, that's not technically cheese you smell.

11) I have a big blog.

12) You going to eat that?

13) Do you want to see my belly?

14) Oh, so you're not pregnant?

15) Most of these are my real teeth.

16) I also like comic books.

17) You're not half the woman my mom is!

18) I bathed today.

19) Was that me or you? Oh, it was me.

20) My tummy hurts.

So, to all you guys out there, here's a tip: Remove these pick up lines from your inventory and you will be one step..well...you'll just be one step period.