Brad Wardell's views about technology, politics, religion, world affairs, and all sorts of politically incorrect topics.
Gratitude is a virtue...
Published on August 28, 2004 By Draginol In Business

Never underestimate the ability of human beings to rationalize their behavior.  No matter what it is you give away freely, you will always end up with some people who will rationalize that they are customers and should be treated as such.  

The blogger who inspired me into starting my blog, Steven Den Beste, has decided to take an extended break from blogging.  In a nutshell, he’s fed up.  Fed up with people nitpicking his writing. People who make demands on him as if they were his customers with some right to make demands.  

He puts it thusly:

I've learned something interesting: if you give away ice cream, eventually a lot of people will complain about the flavors, and others will complain that you aren't also giving away syrup and whipped cream and nuts.

This isn’t confined just to those who write articles that they freely share on the Internet. Any sort of free product, good, or service will have people who feel they are entitled to make demands on the creator.  

 So let me share with you what I consider to be the 5 rules of free stuff:  

(1)   Unless money is being paid by you for the product, good or service being provided, you are not a customer. Get over it. You have no rights. Deal with it.  

(2)    Even if you paid money for the product, good, or service under discussion, your ability to make demands decreases depending on how many separations there are between you and the person you are making demands on.  If you paid the person directly, you have maximum leverage. But the more layers there between you and the person you’re talking to, the more diluted your leverage becomes. If I work at Microsoft and I’m posting on some forum, don’t bitch at me that I need to personally solve your Windows problems .  

(3)   If it’s free be gracious about it. Don’t complain that you should get more free stuff from the person. Anything you ask for is you asking a favor of the person providing the free thing. Polite requests = good. Demands = bad.

(4)   Don’t get mad or accuse the person/company of being “greedy” if some of their products/services aren’t free. Who is really the “greedy” one? The person who has given away things for free or the person who, having paid nothing, makes demands for more free stuff?  

(5)   If you think you can do something better then do it. Talk is cheap. Nothing is impossible for the person who doesn't have to deliver the goods.    

Let me give you some examples of free stuff that we regularly get people demanding customer level treatment:  

JoeUser.com
JoeUser is a free blog site I provide with the help of Stardock. The business case for the site is that it doesn’t cost much to provide and enables us to write articles and attract potential customers by its sheer popularity. Eventually it will hopefully pay for itself by having premium blogs. But that amount will still be fairly small.

Even though it is free, every day I get people who email me personally demanding all kinds of things. Not requests -- demands. Requests for help are fine. Demands are another thing. When people start making demands on how the site is run, they need to look up rule #1. If you’re not paying money for the site, you have no rights. You have no right to demand anything. But still, we see people who regularly make public demands or argue how unprofessional I or someone else is. Unprofessional? We’re not being paid to post there. We’re not paid to moderate. We go on there in our free time because we enjoy it. It really gets surreal when I occasionally get people who will create a blog on JoeUser that will call me all kinds of names. Needless to say, those blogs don't last long. Then come the screams of censorship and cries of first amendment protection. There is no first amendment rights on JoeUser. You want rights, then send me a check for $50,000. That's about the amount this site costs to have each year.

WinCustomize.com
This is another free site – to a point. Originally it was completely free. But the site costs hundreds of thousands of dollars a year to run so we eventually had to put a limit on how much stuff you could download before contributing something back. It had a negative affect on its Alexa ranking but we learned something valuable: We'd rather have fewer users and more customers.

Amazingly, we regularly have people who show moral outrage at the idea that they should have to pay. Somehow we are greedy because they want to use our bandwidth for free forever without giving anything back.

ObjectDock
This is one of the most notorious ones. ObjectDock is the world's most popular "dock" program. Docks are programs that let you put short-cuts and tasks and other things and typically "dock" them to an edge.  ObjectDock is freeware. But from day one, there's been a lot of people who have made demands on us to do this or that with it as if they were customers.  Not requests -- demands (requests are fine).

And when we came out with ObjectDock Plus (2 years later), which adds more features than what was in the free version, all hell broke loose.  All kinds of people started calling us "greedy" and worse. Lots of demands were made that its features should be in the free version. Or that we have no right to charge in the first place. Why? Because we made the free version available first (as if that makes sense).  There are other docks available and they're free too. But they're not updated anymore. Only ObjectDock receives regular updates. But do these people make the connection that maybe the reason the free version keeps getting updates is because of the existence of the Plus version? Not likely.

All of our freeware programs tend to get ignored when people describe our company as a whole.  Because we're a (gasp) for profit software company, we get the lunatic fringe anti-capitalistic people who think it's wrong that we sell software at all. Not that they are willing to write software and give it away. But they consider themselves just as much as customers as the people who pay for non-free products.

Like Steven, I get a lot of nit-picking about my blogs and articles and comments.  Usually from people who feel they know more than I do on a given subject.  Maybe they do but there's no way to know since they're not willing to take the time to demonstrate their knowledge. Most of the time when I write I simply don't have enough free time to qualify every statement to the nth degree. Sometimes I have to oversimplify something to get the point across.  I don't have patience for including things that are theoretically possible. I tend to stick with what is practically possible.

Still, some people will pass me links or names of books or articles that I "need to educate myself with" so that I can write a retraction or correction at a later date.  When I don't answer those emails, I'll occasionally get a "You've just lost a reader" as if they paid for the site.

The bottom line is that if you didn't pay for the product, good, or service that you're using you need to be conscious of that.  Don't delude yourself into thinking you're some sort of customer entitled to anything. Any request you make is asking for a favor. No matter what that request is, no matter how reasonable or justified you believe that request to be, you are asking for a favor.

In other words, don't complain about the free ice cream.


Comments (Page 4)
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on Aug 30, 2004
I have no complaints about free ice cream. Hell, if I don't like the flavor I wont eat it. And if anyone else don't like it oh F--king well.
You are doing us in pc land a favor by giving away free software, and I appreciate it. I admit sometimes I am a little disappointed with what I download, but I find there are more times I am satisfied with what I donwload. That which I dont like, I delete. And from time to time I make donations to sites.

Keep up the good work.
on Aug 30, 2004
completely agreeing with brad.

if i offer to give someone a ride in my car, they'd better not tell me what music to put on the radio. 'beggers can't be choosers'.

i get real tired of doing favors for people and having them criticize the favor or complain the whole time. if someone puts up a site or a program, and you use it, you are just a passanger. unless you are chiping in for gas don't expect the driver to put the additional effort into listening to you bitch. you don't have a contract, you don't have any rights, and making demands isn't going to get you anywhere. it's only gonna ruin your chances for future favors.
on Aug 30, 2004
While on one hand I'd have to agree, the stream of rude and ungrounded demands are deplorable and need to cease, I can't help but think that there's some truth to what's said by others, that when it comes to free vs. paid, things are getting a bit skewed. Products, say software, are paid for in order to perpetuate the entity which created them - be it a conglomerate or an individual. The self-perpetuating myth that the payment is enabling you to make use of/enjoy the product/service/etc. is what may be throwing a wrench into the works here. The purpose of payment is to perpetuate the entity, not to assuage the conscience of the end user. However, the purpose of the end user (through the eyes of the originator) is to PURCHASE the product (not USE) and therefore perpetuate the originator. As long as the product is paid for, the originator is sated. Then, in order for any future payment to be made to the originator, the customer must be sated. This is where the software community seems to be getting kluged. Though noone has the right to demand (per se), regardless of whether someone pays or not, they are the ones who in the long run pay the bills of the originating entity, and therefore, it is the responsibility of said entity (be it StarDock or anyone else) to, at least in some part, satisfy them. Just because they currently use a free product does not mean that they aren't a customer, because, in fact, they may purchase the full product if it suits their needs. To say that free products are released out of generosity or whatever is simply untrue in the case of _any_ company. Companies don't exist on happiness, they exist on paychecks. Though it is true that you'll never make everyone happy, and also true that not all free-users turn into paid-users, as soon as we discount the free-users because they haven't YET payed us for our time, we're shooting ourselves in the foot.
on Aug 30, 2004
I think Draginol made it clear that he has no problem with constructive criticism and polite requests--he just gets tired of the "I want this now or else..." group. Heck--If something is operating as it's advertised to do, even paying customers have no right to be nasty! If something isn't operating to spec civil discourse will probably get it fixed a lot faster than demands and abuse. I, too, have been moved to frustration when something I've purchased fails to work and the seller is less than responsive to polite requests for help. The next step is not to become an idiot--it's far more effective to become even more polite and offer to allow your lawyer (or whatever regulating board might apply) settle the matter. Most of the time this leads to a resolution--even if it's only getting one's money back. Unless you can prove that you have been damaged in some way not covered by the EULA ( almost impossible) that is all you have a right to. In the case of freeware that means that you get what you paid for--nothing!
on Aug 30, 2004
Brilliant bit of writing. Thanks and keep up the good work!
on Aug 30, 2004
Able: I see what you mean. That seems reasonable.
on Aug 30, 2004
That is cute... I do it all the time except I provide a service and not a product... And trust me I hear alot more moaning, bitching, crying then brad and the lot of you combined.


I doubt that. Name the service you run that you get more bitching than all of us combined. I run the world's most popular skin site with over 3 million unique people visiting it each month. I run several games sites and I work on software projects in use by millions of people. My latest product is on the shelves of every computer store in North America right now. So don't try to play "I get more complaining than any of you with my unnamed service and I bend over backwards for the whiners" attitude. Tell us the name of your service.

What brad and company does NOT do is release products for free for the enjoyment of it... They do it to lure customers

And don't sit there and tell us what our motivation is. We had ObjectDock as freeware for over 2 years out there. Why? Because we thought it was cool. Small companies, believe it or not, can do things because they want to. Just like individuals sometimes do things because they want to.

The thrust of his diatribe (article, what article?) is that you didn't pay so f' off which is why in my OG post I asked how much money before the customer does not have to f'off anymore...


Wrong. The "thrust" of this diatribe is that if you're getting something for free, don't pretend you're a customer and start emailing the provider of that free thing with rude demands. The inspiration of this article was that Steven Den Beste, the blogger who inspired me to start JoeUser.com in the first place finally got fed up with people taking on an attitude that they're customers simply for reading his blogs and emailing him demands.
on Aug 31, 2004
I completely agree. Not only is there a real epidmemic in this country of everything being someone else's fault, but that we all deserve something for nothing. I used the trial versions of most of Stardock's products as well as other software companies' shareware before I purchased it. I have even donated (oh the horror!) to many developers of freeware that I thought was useful and deserving of support. Those of us that can't write computer code or don't have the time should show the deserved appreciation of those that take a hobby or passion and take it to the next level and try to succeed on a monetary level. Isn't that after all what this country is all about? As for freedom of speech, I am a firm believer that we all have a right to say whatever we want. But that others have a right to fight against what we say with just as much gusto. But if you want to express your contrary views then start your own forum and gather your own following. That's my opinion anyway. You don't have to like it. You don't even have to read it. Pretty neat how that works, huh?
on Aug 31, 2004
Draginol:

Ahhh... me so sorry you such a big man... BTW: I have yet to see your software on any retailer's shelves... Much less EVERY computer store in North America... For your info I am a doctor and yes I hear bitching and moaning by piss poor idiots everyday... From why did I have to wait (because another moron like you wanted to bitch and complain) to but "I don't want a diet can't my health insurance pay for my lipo if loosing weight is good for me..." to a million other stupidities... But they are the minority... Most people come in, are polite, and are glad to get the help they need, and guess what most of them don't make me or other doctors any money because they are for one reason or another on an HMO. 80% of my income comes from 20% of my patients... So why stay? Becuase I enjoy what I do..

As for whatever the intent for your article that was not the impression I got. Reading your article the only point that seemed to be driven home is that you didn't pay therefore you are worthless and hence stop bugging us. If you read my original post it clearly siad yes there are fuckers out there who bitch and moan but there are a ton more who are appreciative (hey look at this forum alone: three dissenting voices to what 50 odd supporters?) If you put out OD because it was cool then fine but why all the bitching and moaning on your part? Because what 1/25 of the users did not sit there patting you on the back (I am sure the percentage of people who are truly assholes are even smaller)...

Furthermore, "other articles" of stardock employees have all revolved around freeloaders who don't buy our software, and how to make people pay... So, sorry but I don't think this "article" was written w/ altruistic intentions!
on Aug 31, 2004
So the guy who provides the site for free must prove he is altruistic?? Get a grip SL. I'd bet
that if you weren't forced to by contract and perhaps the hippocratic oath you would blow off the folks with no cash.
on Aug 31, 2004
As a business consultant, I deal with proffesionals from all sorts of professions, from storefronts to IT, including a medical private practice. Just to level the field, I want to point out that anonymity is the single biggest setback to customer (or user, as the case may be) relations ever. Period. If you get more bitching in any face to face business than busy IT companies get Via anon email and posts, then it's stricktly you at fault.

In other words Doc, up your malpractice insurance, pronto.

And before someone comments on My anonymous post, you can find me at win customize, registered, and paid in full.

Shadowolfe
on Sep 01, 2004
I work retail, in a bookstore. The amount of people coming in and taking political sides about why we have so many of some book over another political side, is amazing how rude they get. I see this day in and day out, all the time. When we don't get a certain book in stock because the Publisher/Distributitor can't handle the sudden demand for said title? They get even more jaded, rude, one sided, and totally ignorant as to what it takes to run a business and what a company's motivation truely is. Let me spell it out for you. It's to M A K E a P R O F I T! How Stardock has been doing it, is perfect. They don't mislead anyone. When I seen they were doing OD+, I suspected it wasn't going to be for free. Now I wasn't sure if they were going to add it to the ODNT or not, if they had I would have expected the price of it to go up maybe $10 to $15. After all, they do keep adding to that set of programs already. What is there is extremely high quality, or I and a lot of others wouldn't have paid for it. Wouldn't have signed up for WinCustomize accounts ( Which the name above is -my- registered name on WinCustomize ).

In short, you might -think- you are a customer just because you get something for free. You might even think you have the right to boss someone around because you actually paid for something. Truth is, you do not. Customers are -NOT- always right! Usually when someone is pushing this abused phrase around, they're totally in the wrong and already know it. But they want to flex their so called muscle and think they can push their way into getting more than they're fairly intitled too. I can promise a lot of you have done this at one time or another in different levels. Even without even knowing you've done it. All because you think you're always right, because you're the customer. Well, you're not. You no more have the right to -demand- someone to do something, than you do to yell at the clerk behind the counter because your check didn't go through and got declined. It's not that clerk's fault for your check or credit card getting declined. All they did was their end of the job, process the transaction. Yet you feel compelled to yell at them as if they personally set out to ruin your purchase and not take your money.

Yes, some of us pay for the use of certain products at Stardock and their various sites and softwares. This still doesn't give us any rights to be asses to them for it. You can make a request, suggestion, and do it in a kind and friendly manner, or keep it to yourself because no one will listen to you if you're a complete, ignorant idiot who only wishes to shove your oppinions down other's throats. No one likes or cares for that kind of person. I've never posted here before, so I do not know Steven Den Beste. But hearing that anyone quit something they enjoyed, loved, and did for free in their spare time to make such a place as this? All because of some bunch of self rightous, analistic, self centered and for lack of better wording greedy bunch of morons? That's pretty lame and sad. I'm sorry to hear someone gave up something because of such idiots of the world.

Next time someone, maybe you? Your friend with you? Go into a place of business, or log into a chat/forum and start to talk to someone on a very oppinionated subject? Put yourself in the shoes of the person you're about to probably have a long debate with. Before you send in that scathing email, put yourself in that persons shoes. Look at things how they must feel, when they're about to read what you right or deal with you in person. Because let me tell you, if it weren't for laws in this world that keeps me from flat out puching some of the ones I've met square in the nose for being how they are when they deal with me? I'd done it a thousand times over. Because you can't possibly know what the hell you're talking about unless you yourself have dealt with the exact same situations as the ones you've chosen to give hell to. Unless you were on their end, working with them, dealing with the same people they're talking about. I don't care what profession you're in, all professions are different. But all of them have one thing in common! They all have more than their fair share of IDIOTS that love to make demands that favor only themselves! Underlying term here is: GREED!

I totally and full heartedly agree with Draginol! 100%
on Sep 01, 2004
ShadowWolfe: Hey unlike froggy and them I don't get complain about me.. I just here bitching and moaning... And again from a minor set of patients... And unlike froggy I don't mean to imply they only come from HMO patients... Private/Cash patient's also bitch and moan... My point is that if you enjoy what you do that little bit can be dealt w/... If I wanted just to loo athe money aspect yeah I'd be annoyed as hell everytime one of them spoke up.... As for my malpractice, it is halfassed comments like that which would make docs quit if it were only for the money. Here are people giving 18 hour days for you and your family 365d/yr and the best you can do is threaten a lawsuit....
on Sep 02, 2004

Ahhh... me so sorry you such a big man... BTW: I have yet to see your software on any retailer's shelves... Much less EVERY computer store in North America... For your info I am a doctor and yes I hear bitching and moaning by piss poor idiots everyday... From why did I have to wait (because another moron like you wanted to bitch and complain) to but "I don't want a diet can't my health insurance pay for my lipo if loosing weight is good for me..." to a million other stupidities... But they are the minority... Most people come in, are polite, and are glad to get the help they need, and guess what most of them don't make me or other doctors any money because they are for one reason or another on an HMO. 80% of my income comes from 20% of my patients... So why stay? Becuase I enjoy what I do..

If you can't find The Political Machine at retail then you're not looking very hard.  Every computer store I know if is carrying it *right now*. Even non-computer stores that carry computer software such as Walmart have it.

But a doctor who sees individual patients is not going to be someone who is likely to see the volume of complaints that a software developer sees with millions of users.  I know I wouldn't want you as a user or customer though. So your claim that you get a lot more complaints and bitching than all of us on this site (combined) is pretty absurd.

And if you really are a doctor, then I have sympathy for your patients.

on Sep 02, 2004
All I can say is for a doctor, he sure doesn't have much compassion. Nore does he have much insight as to how different the margin of numbers in the software business vs his practice is. For starters, even if you didn't have your game Political Machine on the shelves of so many places ( And yes, I seen it in Wal-Mart's down here in Texas, as well as CompUSA and a few others ), you do still have World Wide Customers from just your Internet Business as Stardock alone. Which means, unless he's doing the patient/client numbers of say..... 10 hospitals on his own? ( Even that isn't what the amount of business Stardock recieves world wide ), he can't possibly have any idea how bad it gets with hateful, spiteful, delusional emails that anyone running an online business can get ( Let alone one that is as successful as Stardock has shown to be ).

So Shadow Lord really needs to get some real insight as to what it is he's talking about before he goes around mocking someone and trying to make some kind of valid point or oppinion based on just his point of view. Which is also based only on that which he can visibly see and read, which isn't the whole picture, it's not even a tenth of it. So all his belittling of any single person at Stardock, is about as worthless when it comes to having any legitimate grounds on which to base his arguments.
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